Thursday, January 5, 2012

Somehow, Things Really DO Get Better

During the Christmas holidays, our daughter came home from her Navy base and after she had been home for awhile, he finally called her.  He wanted to see her, but he actually didn't call to see her until the evening before she was leaving. She had been home for nearly 2 weeks and he waited until it was almost time for her to go back. He happened to be going to a job and wanted to stop and see her right then and there and we were out in public so he wanted to come to where we were, so we waited for him. He came, got out of his vehicle and gave her a big hug.  He had the same car, the same little trailer that he pulls behind it, and the same bushy, unruley hair that he had always had. He looked so much older than the last time that I had seen him. He told me Happy New Year and I told him back, but we didn't talk much because I wanted to let our daughter have what little time with him that he was going to give her. He wanted a hug from me. I certainly didn't want that, but since our daughter was there, I let him give me a small hug for the holidays.  Funny thing was, I no longer felt the love that I had once had for him. Maybe I just didn't allow myself to feel anything, but when I left him with her in the parking lot, I didn't look back. I felt like so much time has passed....and I was finally feeling like things really have gotten better for me. Yes, he was the man that I was so passionately in love with for all those years, and yes, he is the father of my youngest daughter....and yes, he was the man that treated me so horribly when he started seeing the other woman. I spent so much time on this man, and so many years of my life, but somehow, things just seemed to have gotten so much better for me. I didn't cry, I didn't dwell on how I had been hurt, and I felt very happy that things have been over for me and him for quite awhile now. When you sometimes feel that you will NEVER get over him/her that has hurt you so much, just remember that things take time. A long time, in my case.  I feel as though he can no longer hurt me anymore...what a great feeling !

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