Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Spending Too Much Time Wondering Why

Seems that tragedy has a way of creeping into our lives without a moment's notice. Dealing with a cheating husband was one of the hardest things I have ever had to deal with in my life, walking away and learning to let go is more challenging than I can say. Many weeks of wondering why I ever had to go through such pain, wondering why he cheated but never getting the answers and after awhile, wondering why it took so much of my life away hoping that things would get better. Sometimes I ponder upon the fact that I have just spent way too much of my time just "wondering". I know that with time, your heart and soul heal, but with each person, the timetables are different. We never know how long we are going to be on Earth with our loved ones....time is so precious and so short. I think that I should have spent LESS time worrying and wondering and MORE time doing things for myself. Today I am much better, happier than I have ever been. Tragedies still seems to creep into my life. I just lost my precious little chihuahua and I don't even have a clue as to why. You hear people say that things happen for a reason, but in the case of a lost pet, I see no reason for it. Losing my pet not only brings up everything that I miss about her, but it also reminds me of some of the past things that have happened in my life and I wonder IF I will always have a rocky road ahead of me, or will things slow down and become easy going. I need to look forward and keep on moving on......at least I am not worrying about my ex anymore....

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Does The Cheater Find Happiness?

Is it possible for the cheater to find happiness with the other person? I honestly think that while a person is cheating, they are out having fun, doing the kind of things that feels good for them.
Cheating seems to be something they want to do because they don't have to worry about the loads of laundry sitting to be washed, they don't have to worry about how many bills are piled on the table to be paid, and they don't have to worry about anything important while they are out in their "happy place". While it seems to sound great not to have to worry about "life" stuff, eventually, they will have to think about those things. A person who is cheating does not have to think about "life" while they are away from the family. But life DOES go on. As soon as one bill gets paid, it comes right back around again, waiting for the next check. When my ex husband finally moved in with his other woman, he didn't have the "fun" escape anymore, and that's because he has to face the "life" issues with now a different woman. There will always be home repairs, car repairs, dishes to do and laundry to wash, so I don't know at what point the cheater finds happiness with the other person, and maybe it's beyond my thinking, I just don't know how my ex thought that having another woman was any different than what we had, especially since we got along so well. That one's a mystery for me I guess. If anyone out there has a good answer, I would LOVE to hear it.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Can You Recognize A Cheater?

How do you recognize a cheater? I honestly don't think that you can, mostly, but I would think that if he's a big flirt, especially right in front of you, or you notice that he's just way too into "the women" then you might just have a problem. My ex husband was the kind of man who would want to go out to eat but he would stare at other women as they passed by, and yes, it was right in front of me. I hated that about him because I felt that he was being disrespectful towards me. I also noticed that he was extremely nice to his women customers, even not collecting his fee of doing a painting or home repair service at times, but I thought that maybe he was just trying to help someone out who was short of cash. I don't think that you can really ever guess if your partner is going to cheat on you or not, but I think it's a feeling of whether you feel secure in your relationship. I never thought in a million years that my ex would cheat, but he did. For some reason, I always thought that getting married meant that you were to be faithful to your partner but I am hearing and seeing so much adultery on tv, and on the radio these days. What has happened to honestly loving your partner enough to be faithful? I know that faithfulness DOES exist, but why are we hearing so much about cheating spouses?

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