31 Ways to Inspire Your Children

1. Choose your battles wisely ~ give patience where patience is due, and continually ask God for wisdom in discipline.
2. While your children are growing, pray often for their salvation, as the prophet Isaiah wrote, "Drop down, ye heavens, from above, and let the skies pour down righteousness: let the earth open, and let them bring forth salvation, and let righteousness spring up together; I the LORD have created it." ~ Isaiah 45:8
3. Give children age appropriate responsibilities teaching them to care for the things God gives us.
4. Each child is individual; pray that God will help you in developing that individual character.
5. Listen to how your children speak, and encourage them to choose words wisely at school and at home. It’s important to teach them to bridle their tongue.
6. Set standards for your children as you teach them the importance of modest dress. They should represent themselves as holy and acceptable unto God.
7. Never forget to tell your children you’re proud of them. Don’t assume that they already know how you feel.
8. Teach your child to tithe by suggesting that they take one tenth of their allowance to put aside for church offering. Also teach them that we can give in additional ways such as donating old toys and clothes to the poor.
9. Pray often that your children will long to please God, and that they will desire to walk in His ways as the Psalmist wrote, "More to be desired are they than gold, yea, than much fine gold, sweeter also than honey and the honeycomb." ~ Psalm 19:10
10. Pray over your children while they are sleeping. With a heart like Hannah, give them over to God.
11. Start notebooks for each of your children, and together journal the changing world around us. Take note of the tiniest detail in God’s creation. Babies. Snowflakes. Lady Bugs…
12. Keep a running list of prayer requests and pray together as a family often.
13. Bible reading is a wonderful way to spend time together as a family. Make it a routine in your home.
14. Visit relatives often to show children the value of relationships.
15. Choose a character from the Bible and after reading the story together discuss how that message relates to your child today.
16. Give time to your children each day. The time you give makes the words you speak of more value to them.
17. Bring your children to church and help them seek out ways to get involved.
18. Be an example to your children of one who loves her neighbor as herself through random acts of kindness. Lend a helping hand to a busy neighbor, or take time out of a busy day to simply say hello.
19. Try counting the stars on a clear night to show your child how vast God’s creation is.
20. Laughter is medicine for the soul ~ laugh often with your children.
21. Smile often, and let kindness be a cloak you wear as an example to your children.
22. Don’t just tell your children that you love them ~ tell them what you love about them.
23. Pray for purity in the hearts of your children, and the renewing of their spirit as the Psalmist wrote, "Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me." ~ Psalm 51:10
24. Take opportunities to give thanks by taking turns around the dinner table to express what you are thankful for.
25. Encourage praise reports and prayer requests on a regular basis. 
26. Be an example to your children in the way that you love and honor your husband.
27. Enlighten your children to the world around them by supporting missions and teaching them that there is a world both hungry for food and hungry for God. Pray that they will have a heart for missions.
28. Take opportunities to hug your children often, to hold their hands, or to rest an assuring hand on their shoulder.
29. Show your children that you appreciate them by doing something special just for them, like making their favorite meal, or taking them out for an ice cream.
30. As you watch your child grow, pray for meekness in that young spirit--a spirit that will grow in the likeness of Christ. As Paul wrote to the Ephesians in chapter 4:2, "With all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love."
31. Make it a habit to learn scripture together. Children learn best from example. 

You are loved by an almighty God,

Darlene

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She Watches Over the Affairs of Her Household

Has there ever been better direction for time-management than that which comes from, Proverbs 31? I'm reminded of one popular rule in dieting, "Don't waste calories by diving into the bread basket." Here, the same rings true about life:

She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. ~ Proverbs 31:27, KJV

My job as a keeper of the home is to watch over the affairs of my household. This means that I need to engage myself in the home, watching over the affairs of each and every person therein. Where are my children? What video games are they playing? What books are they reading? Who are their friends? Is anything troubling my husband?

These are a few of the things we notice when we're actively involved with the family. With one look my husband can tell when something is bothering me, and I can tell in a split-second when Nathaniel is guilty about something. The more face-time (and I'm not talking about iPhones here) I have with these people the more I'll understand their needs and how fulfill them.

The thing is, moms are busy. There's no doubt about it, but yet I see some incredible moms who manage their house well, raise God-fearing children, have a great marriage, and still find time to write books, take classes, run small businesses, or work outside the home--the Proverbs 31 woman was a prime example of that. But how is it possible for anyone of us to do it all and still be engaged with the family?

It isn't. There isn't one of us who can do "it all," but we can manage to get a lot done when we put our affairs in order. That's where the second part of this verse comes in when it talks about eating the bread of idleness.

Consider the old saying, "There's a place for everything, when everything is in its place." While that's true, I'll also add this, there is no place for anything when junk is in it's place. I can't find the space to put my bath towels when my hall closet is packed with sewing supplies dating back as far as 1992. I can't find room for soup ladles in a drawer that's accumulated broken and useless utensils for the past 23 years.

We can visualize this problem when it comes to the drawers and closets in our home because the stuff eventually starts to fall out, but it's a little harder to see when we're talking about the closets and drawers of our life. What I mean by this is that the storage spaces we refer to as "time" tend to fill up with phone calls, watching television, browsing the internet, hanging out our friends, being over-committed, sitting out in the sun, over sleeping, and the like.

Any one of those things are okay, but just like anything else, they can add up to cramped spaces. The question to ask yourself is what is most valuable to you? Prioritize faith and family first-- the rest will fall into place. Be willing to shed some "idle bread" and you'll free up valuable space in your life.

You are loved by an almighty God,

Darlene

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How to Prepare for Sickness

Weekly Contributor, Kim Brenneman

When a family is sick the house can quickly turn into a mess. It can be overwhelming and discouraging. When we get sick too it is hard to have the energy to deal with it all. It is very nice to know how to have a house prepared for illness. If the messes that can happen are prevented by our preparation ahead of time then we are able to rest and heal ourselves.


It’s easier to plan for sickness when you know what’s coming. For instance, the first trimester of pregnancy or post partum or if you know you’re prone to be put on bed rest. Some things you can see coming and try to prepare for. If you know you’ve been exposed to a bad bug, you can prepare for the worst. Best is to always have a plan to act on whether you know sickness might come or for when it blindsides you.

• It helps to always have a well-stocked medicine cabinet, a variety of herbal teas, and essential oils for various illnesses. We love Gypsy Cold Care by Traditional Medicines. Throat Coat by Traditional Medicines is great for a sore throat. Peppermint essential oil is good for headaches, clearing the sinuses, and a drop in water or tea feels good on a sick tummy.
• Keep your old towels tucked away for when the stomach flu hits, use them to protect the mattress, floor, layer the crib with, and to put over pillows. Many times over the years I have had multiple children lying on towels in the living room with a trash can beside each one. We listened to audio books and they slept on and off through the days. Audio seems to better than television, I think because the moving images upset the sick tummy. When a person is sick the noise of the TV is also more annoying than listening to an audio book.
• For a child with a very upset tummy I make a “nest” in the bathroom beside the toilet. I will lay down an old comforter for softness and cover it with towels.
• Always keep frozen homemade chicken broth in the freezer. That’s one of the big reasons I make chicken and broth every Kitchen Day. Chicken broth feels so good when you are sick. Serve it plain with sea salt for the stomach flu. Spice it up with pepper flakes for the head cold. Add lemon juice and coconut milk for a sore throat.
• How to keep the house from getting trashed? Keep everything as restricted as possible. Keep yourself and all your sick trash, Kleenex, trash can, books, towels, tea cups, etc. in one place. Don’t move your “sick bed” around. Stay put. Assign other people to one spot also for their sickness. The well people must do the work and do no messy activities that would require lots of clean up. The basics are keeping the dishes up, the bathrooms clean, and the “sick laundry” caught up.
• When people start to recover, they must start doing their chores as usual. Do them slow but at least do them. (This is where I went wrong last time we were sick. The people that were getting better started to get out all their messy activities and not pick them up. Legos, stuffed animals, art supplies, toy farm animals, magazines and books were spread everywhere.)
• Your family also needs to be prepared, “When we get sick, this is proper protocol…” and then keep your list of “proper protocol” in your Home Management Book or posted inside a cupboard door for a reference point.
• Simply having a Home Management Book with your routines and every little detail of what you should do next during your days is helpful. When your brain is in a fog you can simply look at the book and it will tell you what the next thing is. It helps you know what to do without thinking. Even with low energy and frequent breaks, keep doing the next thing. If you don’t have a Home Management Book to tell you what to do then you can have a lot of real mental anxiety looking around at all the mess.
• Your daily schedule should be posted big and bold. When your children are off their routine you can take them to the chart and tell them where they should be and what they should be doing. If you don’t have one up then they will continue to flounder about until they get caught up in a project which may or may not be helpful to life under control.
• You may need to take a day of extra housecleaning to get things back up to snuff or an extra laundry day. Cancel or shorten your Town Day or Office Day to make room for extra cleaning and laundry.

The best preparation for being sick is to simply have your household systems running smoothly so that things don’t completely fall off the track and are easy to get up and running again. Being sick is messy business but with some forethought you can be prepared.

Blessings,

Kim Brenneman

Kim is the joyful wife of Matt and the blessed mother of nine children.

When not busy homeschooling and farmschooling, she enjoys writing, gardening, cooking, reading, sewing, and crafting.

Kim lives on a farm in Iowa where her family grows beef cattle, corn and beans, and operates a micro-dairy selling cheese at farmer’s markets. She loves to write and speak about her passion for home and family. She is the author of Large Family Logistics: The Art and Science of Managing the Large Family. She blogs about the same subject at:
http://largefamilylogistics.blogspot.com.

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How to Teach Our Daughters ~ And a Titus 2sday Linkup!

We need to teach our daughters
to distinguish between:

A man who flatters her
and a man who compliments her.

A man who spends money on her
and a man who invests in her.

A man who views her as property
and a man who views her properly.

A man who lusts after her
and a man who loves her.

A man who believes he is God’s gift to women
and a man who remembers a woman was God’s gift to man.

And then teach our boys to be that kind of man.

~ Author Unknown

Note: I have just added FOUR extra chapters (56 pages) to "The Good Wife's Guide!" And the paperback version is coming out in a couple of weeks! 

P.S. If you have purchased the eBook and would like an updated copy, please email me. This is only for readers who have previously purchased the eBook. 

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Today and every Tuesday, I want to invite bloggers to link-up any blog posts that will encourage women to joyfully live out their roles as wives and keepers of their homes I'm looking for posts on marriage, parenting, housekeeping, or recipes.

1. Enter the direct link from your post into the linky tool below!

2. Please link back here with the {TITUS 2}SDAYS code (below) so that other bloggers can join in too!

3. Enjoy each other's fellowship, and have fun!

FAQ:
Can I use an old post, or do I need to use a current one?You can absolutely use an older post if you feel that the post is a great fit for this meme. Have fun!

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Three of the Most Important Words a Parent Could Say to their Child!

Dance WITH Me!

Guest contributor Gina from Keepin' it Real


We want them to learn how: to obey,  to share,  to be kind,  to love others, to be humble,  to be pure,  to be grateful, to build up, and encourage others!

We want them to learn how to:  to serve, to show grace,  to work hard,  to be responsible,  and to not be lazy!

We want them to:  follow God,  depend on God,  trust in God,  have faith in God,  and love God!

We want them to:  be content with what they are given,  learn to love God's word,  grow in their walk with God,  be careful with what they watch,  be careful where they go,  be careful with what they read.

We want them to learn the "dance of life"....a life lived for God.

We can TELL them about the dance...

We can TELL them they need to obey, share, be kind, love others, be humble, be pure, and to be grateful. We can TELL them to build up and encourage others, to serve, to show grace, to work hard, be responsible, and to not be lazy. We can TELL them to follow, depend on, trust in, have faith in and love God. We can TELL them to be content with what they are given. We can TELL them they need to learn to love God's word and grow in their walk with Him. We can TELL them to be careful what they watch, where they go, and what they read.

Are WE dancing the "dance of life"?... a life lived for God? 

Will they learn the dance by watching us? By following in our steps?

• Are WE living lives that are characterized by obedience? Do WE reach out to others, not showing favoritism, and serve them by sharing the gifts God has loaned us? Do WE love others with a humble heart, seeing them as more important than ourselves? Do WE seek to encourage and build others up, and show others the same grace WE have been shown?

• Are WE grateful people? Are WE content with the home we have...the car we have...the husband we have? Are WE hard workers, doing more than what is required of us, and doing all that we do for the glory of God? Are WE lazy? Are WE good stewards of the bodies, time, and possessions that have been given to us?

• Are WE following God, depending on and trusting in Him to meet all of our needs? Even in a time of financial crisis? Do WE love God? Are WE growing in our walk with Him? Are WE faithful to spend time in His Word, and can other's tell we have spent time with Him by how we speak, by our attitudes, by how we respond and react to life's circumstances? Are WE careful about where we go, what we watch (even when we are alone) and who our companions are?

The dance steps: 1-2-3...1-2-3...1-2-3

1. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.
2. Teach His words diligently, talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.
3. Bind His words as a sign on our hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. (Deuteronomy 11)

1-2-3...1-2-3...1-2-3...

Learn the dance....

Live the dance...

Teach, talk, and dance the dance.

Make the dance a part of who you are!  If they can see the dance, it will be easier for them to learn it! And then you will be able to extend your hand to them and ask them to join you! You will be able to say, "Dance WITH me!"

Oh! The joy on that day when your children have learned the "dance of life"...a life lived for God. When they tell you that you taught them the steps. And when you extend your hand and they join you in the dance! Oh! What joy!

 1-2-3...1-2-3...1-2-3

"I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth." 3 John 1:4

Keepin' it Real,


Gina

Gina has been married to Brian for 23 years. Brian is a faculty member, and they both serve as deans at a Christian college. She and her family live on the college campus and work with the resident students. She has two children, Brianna (age 21) and Caleb (age 18) who are now both in college. In her spare time Gina writes and seeks to encourage women of all ages, through articles and by living life with them as much as possible! You can find her at her personal blog: "Keepin' it Real,"at "The Internet Cafe," "MomLife Today" "Roo Mag," and featured in several issues of "Best of Life" magazine.

Contact Gina through her website: Keepin' it Real

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The Joy of Marriage & Motherhood - And a Titus 2sday Linkup!

I put a question out to the ladies on the facebook group the other day, and as the answers began to roll in I started tearing up. I was so blessed reading each and every one of the comments, and if you haven't seen them yet--I think that you will be too.

I asked them, "What is your greatest joy in being a wife or a mom or both?"

Mine is the comfort of home. There is nothing like it. Knowing that I have a place where I can be "me" and I'm loved. Praising God for His gift of family!

Now, here is what my readers had to say,
Knowing that I am married to a man of faith, who prays for me and loves the Lord. ~ Ida

Knowing it's exactly where God wants me!! And all of your statement, too! ~ Arron

Welcoming my husband back into our home after a long deployment. I love making our home into a retreat of sorts for him (well...a retreat with art projects toys and bedtimes). ~ Juliana

In addition to your comment, I'd have to say the smiles and cuddles from hubby and kiddos. While it can be exhausting at times, it makes the late nights and hard work worth it to see them happy and taken care of! ~ One Small Town Girl

Knowing no matter how badly I think I've failed, I have a husband who loves and supports me and beautiful children who are true blessings. The good days are easy....this gets me through the not so good ones. ~ Melissa

Laughing together. God gave me the family I didn't have as a child. ~ Just Jules

What you said! ~ Anita

Snuggling with my kids-no matter how hard the day was or how many times I might have felt like I was losing it, when I get to cuddle with them before bed, those precious moments make it all worth it. ~ Noelle

Having a man who loves me and I know it and don't ever have to wonder about if he loves me or not. Being a Mom it's being able to be home with them, tucking them in at night etc. Loving the life God has given me. ~ Mary Beth

They are both wonderful, being a wife, mom.... love being surrounded by my family (insane as it may be at times).... but being a grandma - now that just pulls it all together. A lapful of grandkids - and kids and spouse all around. A full house. ~ Claudette

Getting chocolate faced kisses and jelly covered hands hugging me tight. I love when my husband comes home in the evenings, puts his arms around me and kisses me! It truly is the simple things for me!!! ~ Stephanie

I think Just Jules said exactly how I feel also! Making the memories with my children that I never had in childhood! Wonderful! ~ Hailey

The love from my amazing children!!!! Best feeling ever! ~ Rachel

I agree with what u said. Beautifully put! Somewhere I'm accepted even when I'm not perfect. I hope I make my family feel the acceptance in our home that they give to me! ~ Amy

I love my eight children but when my husband comes home (he works out of town currently) and hugs me and takes a deep, deep breath and says, "I'm sooo glad to be home"...that makes me feel like I am the center of the universe. The man loves me:-). ~ Generational Womanhood

Amen! Home Sweet Home, there is no place like HOME…My family loves the Lord, and I have great JOY. We Homeschool our children and my husband loves coming home, I am blessed. ~ Hilda

It's amazing.... it's the same stuff that makes us all tick and that make us *sigh* that happy, content sigh. I've been married 20 years, and I still *love* that moment hubby walks through the door, hugs me and sighs, 'Oh, it's soooo good to be home. Like Generational Womanhood (above), I feel I'm centre of the universe. And my kids - right up to my 18-year-old boy - turning to me for no apparent reason and saying, 'I love you, Mum'. I wouldn't swap my world ....for the world! ~ Homeschool on the Croft

My greatest joy in being a wife is the feeling of being a part of a team - of everyday waking beside my love and knowing that by God's grace we will be able to make a difference in someone's life. My greatest joy in being a mom of grown kids is to see God working in their lives - to see them put God at the center of their lives, see them serving Him, and know that all the times I messed up as a mom, HE covered it. All things are grace. ~ Encourage Your Spouse

“Just Jules” hit the nail on the head! Making memories and creating traditions with my boys. Knowing my husband loves me, the broken me. No matter what. Looking back, recognizing the He orchestrated it all, and everso thankful. ~ Carrie

Laughter and making memories. ~ Amy

Wife - Mom, both but in that order... My Jim-dear loves me no matter how ugly I am for that time. I have been known to act quite ugly, I don't want to but I have... Sigh. He loves me any way just like HE loves me always. ~ Cynthia

Greatest joy being married for almost 18 years to the man God gave me, loving each other more and more every day, Growing together in the Lord. Loving our children, and watching them grow, and loving us back, and loving the Lord. There is so much more! ~ Kathleen S.

Knowing that I'm doing God's will. Before I was married, before I learned that being a wife and possibly a mom were perfectly acceptable ways to "spend" one's life, I was seriously confused by my feminist upbringing. After I graduated from college, I seriously considered going to law school and even running for public office because I wanted to have a positive impact on the world. I figured I could only do that if I was out there effecting some political change in favor of the "oppressed." But, deep down, I really just wanted to be a wife and mom - however, I truly felt that God would be disappointed with me if I didn't do more, something more visible. I then met my husband-to-be and began attending his church where I learned that being a wife and mother are the highest and most noble callings a woman can have. There is true joy in knowing that I'm right in the center of His will when I live purposefully to help and support my husband and rear the five children He so graciously gave me in a redemptive, Christ-centered fashion. God is so good to make His will known to us through His word and then give us the grace, the enabling, to carry it out. ~ Kathleen D.

My greatest joy is creating a haven for my family. A place of comfort, whether it’s in our home or just my arms, they know they have a place to go for comfort, somewhere warm and inviting that's always available and open. ~ Stephanie

It is the same for me. ~ Autumn Lee

Mine is knowing I am exactly where God wants me to be. So many people are looking for their place in this world and I know exactly where mine is - at home. ~ Happy Wives Club

You are loved by an almighty God,

Darlene

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Today and every Tuesday, I want to invite bloggers to link-up any blog posts that will encourage women to joyfully live out their roles as wives and keepers of their homes I'm looking for posts on marriage, parenting, housekeeping, or recipes.

1. Enter the direct link from your post into the linky tool below!

2. Please link back here with the {TITUS 2}SDAYS code (below) so that other bloggers can join in too!

3. Enjoy each other's fellowship, and have fun!

FAQ:
Can I use an old post, or do I need to use a current one?You can absolutely use an older post if you feel that the post is a great fit for this meme. Have fun!

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What Defines Quality Time? And a Titus 2sday Linkup!

Quality time is found in the unexpected moments of life. 

It's not defined by the hour,
but simply by our devotion one to another.

~ Time-Warp Wife

Graham asked me to solve a riddle the other day. It went like this: An eight foot tall man is standing on a chair, how tall is he now? Right off the bat I figured that he was expecting me to say 11 feet, so I went in the other direction and guessed 5. I figured 8ft - 3ft (for the chair). But the answer was simple: 8 feet. Graham said it doesn't matter whether or not the man stands on a chair or not, if he's 8ft tall, he's always 8ft tall. Leave it to a 12-year-old to pull one over on me!


When I got to thinking about time this week, I realized that it's a similar thing--an hour is an hour regardless of which way we slice it. We all hear about "quality" time and how it trumps "quantity" time, but does it really? Does taking your kid to a ball game add more to his life than working in the garage together might? Would taking your daughter to the ballet enrich her life anymore than making dinner, setting the table and washing dishes together could? Anyway you spend it, one hour is still just an hour. The quality of that time is dependent upon our devotion one to the other.

It's important, in fact it's vital that we spend quality time with our children, but quality time can never take the place of quantity. Here are two very good reasons for this:

• Children need both.
• Quality time develops when you least expect it.

Here's an example. When I was a child we went on a family vacation to Banff, Alberta. It was incredible. We got to ride in a gondola lift and took a trip to Heritage Park. It was definitely something I'll never forget. But I have to say this: I believe that my character was greatly influence by the countless nights we spent sitting around the kitchen table with my dad. It was simply time spent together. Nearly every night Dad would tell us stories from his past, he'd sing a few songs, and he'd always make us laugh. Nothing was planned, it just fell into place because he was ready and willing to spend "time" with his daughters.

I received a letter in my inbox the other day. After reading it over I realized what it is that children crave, and what my children remember the most about me. It blessed my heart, and if you read it I think you'll know why (click to view larger image):

Subscribers: If you can't read this, click through to my website: http://www.timewarpwife.com

Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." ~ Matthew 19:4, NIV

You are loved by an almighty God,

Darlene

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Today and every Tuesday, I want to invite bloggers to link-up any blog posts that will encourage women to joyfully live out their roles as wives and keepers of their homes I'm looking for posts on marriage, parenting, housekeeping, or recipes.

1. Enter the direct link from your post into the linky tool below!

2. Please link back here with the {TITUS 2}SDAYS code (below) so that other bloggers can join in too!

3. Enjoy each other's fellowship, and have fun!

FAQ:
Can I use an old post, or do I need to use a current one?You can absolutely use an older post if you feel that the post is a great fit for this meme. Have fun!

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One Awesome Piece of Advice Every Parent Should Know

A few years ago--make that about eighteen--my husband and I took our son on a camping trip along with two other families. One of the families were our neighbors (also a young couple with one child at the time) and the other family was my sister, her husband and their three teenagers.

About two days into the trip my neighbor commented on how surprised she was that these teenagers went camping with their parents as often as they did. Not only did they camp together as a family, but they seemed to enjoy each others company.


Fast forward eighteen years. Those teenagers are in their thirties now, one son has a child of his own, and they still go camping as a family a few times each year. What's their secret? How is it that my sister's grown children enjoy hanging out with their parents when so many other children don't?

I got to thinking about this last night and my mind traveled back about eighteen years to a day when Betty and her husband sat in my living room offering us a valuable piece of advice. "If you want your children to hang out with you when they grow up," she said, "then make an effort to hang out with them as they're growing up."

Having a twenty-year-old son of my own I can look back and see that this little piece of advice was of great value to us. All the years that I homeschooled him come back to me when he comes home for a visit. All of the times we sat and played Monopoly with him come back to us when he sits at our table playing board games on family night. All of the times I took him out for a hamburger come back to me now when he says, "Mom I have a day off work tomorrow, do you want to go for lunch?" And all of the times we held hands to pray before sharing a meal wash over me like blessing when I see him bow his head in a prayer of his own.

When I'm talking about spending time with your children I'm not specifically talking about the big things. Maturity holds an accumulation of the little things that form who we are.

Here are just a few little things that we can do WITH our kids:

• Go to church with your children
• Eat meals with them
• Take them grocery shopping
• Take them out for ice cream
• Enjoy walks together
• Visit other families
• Watch movies on a Saturday night
• Cook together
• Clean house together
• Plan your day together
• Read stories as a family
• Do homework together
• Visit people at the hospital with them
• Fold laundry together
• Ride bikes
• Do each others hair
• Dance
• Wrestle
• Talk
• Laugh in the car with each other
• Sing in the car
• Weed the garden
• Bath the dog
• Paint a room
• Take photos
• Enjoy a bonfire
• Camp out in the back yard
• Play board games
• Go to the park
• Make a snowman
• Wash the car
• Laugh at funny videos
• Sew matching aprons
• Draw pictures
• Tell stories

Want your children to visit you twenty years from now? Spend time with them today.

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. ~ Proverbs 22:6

It was also about eighteen years ago when I came across this poem. The words have stuck with me ever since:

You are loved by an almighty God,

Darlene

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I'm over at "Keepin' it Real" today sharing a post called, "What it Means to Cover Our Marriage." Hope you stop in for a visit!

Linking up with: The Gentleness Challenge

A Week-by-Week Plan to Managing Your Children's Bedrooms

Children hate overwhelming messes just as much as we do. And like us, they can pretend not to see it for a long time. When parents can’t stand the sight anymore it often turns into a big teary event with impatient words, threats, and a big box for the junk/treasures.

Let’s stop this nonsense cycle, because it is not glorifying to God. Children need to learn to clean and care for their belongings. We, as the parents, are responsible for teaching them biblical stewardship principles. Children aren’t born knowing organizational and management skills. Well, most of them aren’t. I did hear once of a little boy that was very careful about every little thing in his room down to lining up his shoes a certain way.

Out of nine children so far, I have some that have tendencies towards being more organized than others. None, however, knew how to pick up their toys, books, clothes, shoes, and all their other little things without somebody teaching them. Yes, they can get something out and they should be able to put it away but they were born with a sin nature which causes them to choose the lazy way of leaving something lie at the location that they were done with it.

Sounds like me. I fight it in myself everyday. Self-discipline, the skill that a child needs in order to return a toy, keep his room clean, and brush his teeth every morning, is something that we as parents need to teach them. It is a painful and long process--well, I think it is anyway. But the rewards are worth the work.

The children and I like to see a clean bedroom. We admire it, and pat each other on the back. We talk about working as unto the Lord and how much He wants us to be good stewards of His gifts. Instead of the painful pick-up of a pig-sty we are learning how to be better stewards.

Now, let’s not make any excuses and get started!

"Precious treasure and oil are in a wise man’s dwelling,

but a foolish man devours it." ~ Proverbs 21:20

There are two things that make bedroom cleaning easier to keep up with. One is to have a regular daily routine. When the children are used to doing the same thing at the same time day in and day out it becomes a habit. The longer they do that one thing, the more ingrained it becomes. Think of meal-time routines. Usually we eat at the same time--following the same patterns every day. That is why it is easier to build new habits or scheduled items around mealtimes. Routines are not a bad thing. I know that there is an impulsive anti-routine crowd out there, let me advise of you of one thing. Your children will be happier and more secure with a routine. This does not mean that you can’t occasionally break from it and do go on some exciting adventure, it simply means that an ordinary day will go more smoothly for everyone if a routine is followed. Give it a try for awhile and see if I’m not right.

The other thing that makes bedroom cleaning easier to keep up with is "know what to do and how to do it." When the little children change their clothes be there with them (or a big kid) and teach them to put their dirty clothes in the basket.

If they drop it on the floor, stop them and say, “Where do your dirty clothes go?” and say it with them, “The dirty clothes go in the basket.”

The bed need to be made every day of course. Doing this one thing makes the bedroom appear neat and clean simply because the beds are the largest objects in the room. Point this out to your children and when doing a room, clean-up make the beds first. It bolsters the spirits to see a neatly made bed at the start of recovering a disastrous room. To get your children to make their beds every day will require diligence on your part to check up on them, and of course it will add to their chore charts. Teach them how to do it properly but also do the next step of checking up on them.

"Know well the condition of your flocks,

and give attention to your herds…" - Proverbs 27:23

Self-discipline on your part will translate to self-discipline on theirs. I know it’s hard and there are a hundred other things that you would rather do, but do you really want to be raising slobs? Teach them when they’re young and it will be easier as they get older and they will in turn teach the younger children. When they are grown and have a neat and tidy house, they will thank you for teaching them these little basic skills.

While you are teaching them and checking on them, be joyful, sing, and talk to your children with a smile in your voice. A cheerful heart is good medicine but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. Do not dry up the bones of your children. Train yourself to wake up with joy and spread that joy to your children as you help them and check on their bedroom chores every morning.

Morning bedroom chores should be done in 5 minutes or less and kept simple for example, make the bed and put clothes in proper place and shut doors and drawers. You should be doing the same in your bedroom. If you have lots of little children and no big kids to help train, then do each bedroom as a group teaching as you go.

When tackling a big disaster you really need to do it with the children as a team. While you work, talk conversationally--not lecture style about why we clean, how we clean, how we keep it clean, and so on. The littlest children need you to get down with them, on their level and pick up toys with them. Make it a fun game. Pick it up by type of item such as picking up the dolls first. If you can, try to keep toys out of the bedrooms except for one or two favorites.

Keeping all the toys in one area of the house makes the pick-up more efficient and when the children have no reason to play in their bedrooms the bedrooms stay neater. Look at the bedroom from the children’s perspective and talk to them about what is needed to make it more neat and organized.

Your children need to learn how to organize, how to work efficiently, and how to stick to a task. You will probably have to do this work with them for awhile until they have learned how. After you feel they have successfully learned how to do the work, you will then need to inspect it after they are done and hold them accountable. If they see you doing these same tasks in your bedroom while they are working, they will work more willingly. They hate to feel that they are missing out on anything fun that might be going on elsewhere in the house.

"Moreover, it is required of stewards that they be found trustworthy." ~ 1 Corinthians 4:2

To prevent big bedroom disasters from happening and to keep the bedrooms thoroughly clean, work through the weekly focus areas listed below. You can do the work whenever it suits your family; we do them during "Afternoon Chore Time." Work hard for 15 minutes. Take a break if it’s not done, then work for another 15 minutes.

Teach the children to complete the job and not leave it half-way. Some of these chores won’t take that long at all, and all of them-if consistently done-will be easy. It’s when dirt and debris is allowed to pile up that a job turns awful. Once again, if you have only little children then do each room as a team. If you have older children that are able to work independently then be sure to encourage and inspect their work while you work on your bedroom or help the little children.

Shared bedrooms should be done as a team by the occupants. You might want to further break down bedroom chores and assign them for children who share rooms.

Write down the following bedroom chores on a paper, slide it into a page protector, and hang it on a door or someplace in the room. Place a copy on the refrigerator or wherever you hang your other chore charts so that you can advise the children from “grand central station.”

Managing Bedrooms Week-By-Week

• Week 1 - Have the children straighten and de-clutter the tops of their desks, dressers, tables, window sills or any other flat surfaces in their bedrooms. Assign one surface per day, or assign a time period per day, or assign a day of the week to spend some time on this area of their bedroom.
• Week 2 - This week have the children clean under the beds. After shoveling it all out (the fun part) they might be overwhelmed. Give them a trash bag for the trash, and then put all books away. Next, all stuffed animals, and the rest of the toys to their proper place. Finally, put away whatever else is left. Hopefully, there are no rotten apple cores. Like everything else, if this is done on a regular basis, it never gets that bad. But left for 6 months, the under-bed clean out can be quite a trial.
• Week 3 - This week is for the children to straighten their closets. Have them get in the corners, nooks, and crannies, and dig all the things out that they might have tossed in and forgotten about. After digging out, they must put things in their proper place. Put the clothes on the shelves or hang up. If they are old enough to sort out the torn, stained, too small, unworn clothes have them do so and put into the trash or a give-away box. Doing this regularly is essential for clothing and closet control.
• Week 4 - This week, the children de-clutter, straighten, and thoroughly dust the shelves in their rooms.
• Week 5 - This week have the children clean windows and curtains, as needed and if able to; walls-de-clutter and catch cobwebs; wipe grime from light switches; lights-dust and change bulbs if able to; door-dust top, wipe grime from door and door knob.

By teaching your children to do a 5-minute-bedroom-clean-up routine every morning and a focus area every week, you will help your children learn to be organized and self-disciplined. It’s not easy to teach your children these things but you are helping them learn biblical character traits.

While working with your children you are also building relationships with them and teaching your children how God wants us to work.

"Whoever is slack in his work is a brother to him who destroys." ~ Proverbs 18:9

Blessings,

Kim Brenneman

Kim is the joyful wife of Matt and the blessed mother of nine children.

When not busy homeschooling and farmschooling, she enjoys writing, gardening, cooking, reading, sewing, and crafting.

Kim lives on a farm in Iowa where her family grows beef cattle, corn and beans, and operates a micro-dairy selling cheese at farmer’s markets. She loves to write and speak about her passion for home and family. She is the author of Large Family Logistics: The Art and Science of Managing the Large Family. She blogs about the same subject at:
http://largefamilylogistics.blogspot.com.

If you'd like to leave a comment, visit Time-Warp Wife on facebook: Click here

And you can also find Kim on facebook too: Large Family Logistics

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Passionate Parenting at the Feet of Our Lord

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another. ~ John 13:34-35

Our families are the first formative relationships for our children. How we react to them as needy babies, teach them to share and cooperate as siblings, express mercy and grace when they are naughty, and express unconditional love are all guided by our understanding of who we are as followers of Jesus. Love, as Jesus taught, is our guide. Loving others is God’s working through us.

So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets. ~ Matthew 7:12

How does this translate into our family life? First, get down on the level of little children and look into their eyes with love. This takes time. Not much but when you’re busy getting a meal ready or running to switch laundry loads you have to STOP and look into the eyes of the child who needs your attention. Do you have one that is extra naughty? Then that one needs more one-on-one guidance. If that guidance is to be effective then it must be done in love, relationally, eye-to-eye.

The eye that you give your children must not be a condescending eye, a haughty eye, an eye of embarrassment, a rolling eye, a continually disappointed and disapproving eye, but an eye of love. How do you expect that Jesus looked at the children He ministered to? How do you expect Jesus looks at you? Love and compassion are how we minister to our children and that comes through not only our serving hands but when we look at our children. The words that come out of our mouths must match the eyes that our children are looking at. When we truly see them as tender souls that need Jesus, just as much as we need Jesus, then they are feeling not just the love of a mother but the love of Jesus.

But when Jesus saw it, he was indignant and said to them, "Let the children come to me; do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. ~ Mark 10:14

In order for us to consistently and persistently mother our children through the power of Jesus we need to sit at His feet. Read your Bible and study Him. The days are busy, I know, so read your children the gospels. Read a little bit every day and learn to know Him with them. There is more to Jesus than His birth and His death and resurrection. He is the source of wisdom. He is the source of love. By reading the stories of Jesus to your children, you will all learn together how to be like Jesus. You will learn how to love each other. You will practice together being like Jesus, looking at each other through the eyes of Jesus.

Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teaching. But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, "Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me." But the Lord answered her, "Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her." ~ Luke 10:38-42

The dishes and laundry aren’t going anywhere. The children will always need another bath, a haircut, nails trimmed. The math, science, and spelling will educate them, surely. But what will it all matter if they don’t know Jesus beyond His birth and death and resurrection?

When they are questioned someday, “Why is Christianity the only valid religion?” “Aren’t there many ways to reach God?” Will your children really know Jesus? Or will He seem to them as a great prophet among other great prophets? Spend the time you have with your children at the feet of Jesus and then talk about Him as you go about your daily work.

When our children are at the feet of Jesus with us, they will learn, they will grow in their faith, and they will see the reality of a living God. They will learn to know the only true God. They will learn that God cares about the intimate details of our lives; that God teaches us to see others as He does; that God loves us and others unconditionally. Our children will grow up under the love, mercy, and grace of sinful parents who are sitting at the feet of Jesus with them.


Blessings,

Kim Brenneman

Kim is the joyful wife of Matt and the blessed mother of nine children.

When not busy homeschooling and farmschooling, she enjoys writing, gardening, cooking, reading, sewing, and crafting.

Kim lives on a farm in Iowa where her family grows beef cattle, corn and beans, and operates a micro-dairy selling cheese at farmer’s markets. She loves to write and speak about her passion for home and family. She is the author of Large Family Logistics: The Art and Science of Managing the Large Family. She blogs about the same subject at:
http://largefamilylogistics.blogspot.com.

If you'd like to leave a comment, visit Time-Warp Wife on facebook: Click here

And you can also find Kim on facebook too: Large Family Logistics

If you would like to have Time-Warp Wife delivered to your inbox daily, simply click here: Subscribe to Time-Warp Wife

Linking up with: The Gentleness Challenge

How to Create Family Traditions

Memories (not all of them but some of them) should be
planned with the same careful kind of planning one would
give to planning a museum. A family life in retrospect should
be a museum of diverse and greatly varied memories, with
a unity that makes the grouping of people involved share
at least many if not all of the overlapping memories.

~Edith Schaeffer, What is a Family?

By Weekly Contributor, Kim Brenneman, Large Family Logistics

Think back to your childhood home and family. Likely you have memories of daily rituals of food, smells, and sights. Did your family have a daily prayer time? Additionally, there are seasonal memories like raking leaves, smells of fall, apples, and pumpkins; sledding and hot chocolate; Christmas albums played in your home; the smell of tilling the garden and planting seeds or flowers; summer ball games, hot humid air, swimming, popsicles. Memories are connected with our senses. We know what the air felt like, the smells, the tastes of certain foods and when these things are connected with good and happy experiences they are a powerful comfort when we get the slightest experience of them again. A certain scent or feel in the air can bring a surge of memories from the past.

Memories of traditions are part of who we are as people. When a time of day comes around, a season or a holiday we have expectations for good things to happen. We want to relive a time in life. A deep part of us remembers something that fills us with love and hope. As mothers we have the power to create experiences that impact our families for their good. What will they remember every Christmas for their whole life?


As Christians we are mandated to teach our children the Shema from Deuteronomy 6, “The LORD our God, the LORD is one. You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.” Our traditions should point our children to that truth.

That can be done easily through an attitude of prayerful thankfulness that comes out of our mouth all the time. “Isn’t God good to us? He has given us _________.” That truth can be expressed in our daily routines when we put oatmeal on the table with honey and raisins and it can be expressed on Independence Day when we stand for the flag during the  town parade.


God marked the Hebrew calendar with feasts and celebrations to bring the focus to Him and the great things He has done. He gave us six days of work and a day of rest, set apart for Him. He is a God of order and a God of remembrance and festivals. The greatest event of all time happened when God sent us Jesus as a baby, to grow up as man, who lived a perfect life, suffered and died on the cross for our sins, rose again conquering death so that we may live with Him forever. We may not know when He was exactly born. We might not have done as the church fathers of the past did by replacing a pagan celebration with a holy day. But God is sovereign. He has a plan. Today we live in a culture that does not worship the idols of the past but is consumed with commercialism, materialism, selfishness.  We must keep our families and our feasts and celebrations centered on Christ.

How do we do this? We moms are busy enough with managing schedules, laundry, dishes, cleaning, and the rest. Add in a holiday and we are tipping towards chaos. I don’t think that God meant for feasts and celebrations to bring on burnout. Let’s first fix ourselves by taking our eyes off of the work and putting it onto Christ. Make Him your partner and talk to Jesus about your plans and your work all the day long.

As you create the traditions of your days and seasons and holidays with their scents, sights, tastes, and experiences of love and goodness keep them Jesus-centered. Remind your children of the good things that God has done for us, for you, for your family. Tell your children why we do certain things. Big speeches are not necessary, although sometimes a presentation is appropriate, but talk to your children in your everyday conversations as you work, bringing up the whys and hows of your family’s actions.

Someday our children will be grown, creating their own homes and family traditions. They will have memories of their childhood that will be warm and comforting, and if we have done our job right they will know why we celebrate and do the things we do. A valid tradition is one in which our children will in turn teach their children, The LORD our God, the LORD is one. You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.

Blessings,

Kim Brenneman

Kim is the joyful wife of Matt and the blessed mother of nine children.

When not busy homeschooling and farmschooling, she enjoys writing, gardening, cooking, reading, sewing, and crafting.

Kim lives on a farm in Iowa where her family grows beef cattle, corn and beans, and operates a micro-dairy selling cheese at farmer’s markets. She loves to write and speak about her passion for home and family. She is the author of Large Family Logistics: The Art and Science of Managing the Large Family. She blogs about the same subject at:
http://largefamilylogistics.blogspot.com.

If you'd like to leave a comment, visit Time-Warp Wife on facebook: Click here

And you can also find Kim on facebook too: Large Family Logistics

If you would like to have Time-Warp Wife delivered to your inbox daily, simply click here: Subscribe to Time-Warp Wife


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