Sin Today - Salvation Tomorrow?

Drawn from my archives

I received a question from a reader that recently had a discussion with a friend of hers about sin. This friend had been having an affair with a married man for some time now, but because of his faith—and advice from his pastor—he decided to break things off with her.

There were a lot of details that I won’t go into, but what I will do is address the question that was at the root of the letter. That question is this, “If God forgives us for everything, how come we can’t be together and make it right with God?”


That’s a good question. Why can’t we sin today and ask for forgiveness tomorrow?

We don’t always understand why God doesn't give us the things we desire, but the bottom line is that we don’t have to understand. God's wisdom exceeds ours, and we are called to accept that. This is what’s known as giving up our will for His.

The minute that we start to question God's wisdom and say things like, "MY God is compassionate, he wants me to be happy and understands that I have to be with this man..." Then we are taking the true image of God--according to His wisdom laid out in scripture--and forming it into a golden calf that we can worship.

It's so much easier to worship something that molds to our idea of what God should be.

We aren't called to walk an easy life. In fact this very thing might be a test that asks, "Are you willing to give up your life for mine?" That's what we're called to do.

When Abraham was asked to sacrifice Isaac, he didn't say, "MY God wouldn't want me to harm this child, MY God is compassionate." He was willing to give up anything and everything he loved without having to understand why. It was counted to him for faith.

Christians live by faith. Taking up our cross daily means that we are fighting a constant battle against the flesh so that the Spirit will win. That's what walking in the Spirit is.

The flesh isn't merely our skin. It represents our human nature along with our passions and desires.

For they that are after the flesh domind the things of the flesh; but theythat are after the Spirit the thingsof the Spirit.~ Romans 8:5, KJV

But when we’re in love with someone or something, everything in our body is telling us that this is right--that this can’t be wrong or we wouldn’t feel this way. That’s where we err. The heart is deceitful above all things, therefore we need to keep our eyes fixed on the Lord at all times and ignore the passions that the heart is longing for. Even temptation this great will eventually flee.

But the root of the question was this:

“If God forgives us for everything, how come we can’t be together and make it right with God?”

I'm going to share a verse that I shared with another lady about a week ago, because it's an incredible piece of scripture that addresses this issue.

And the LORD said unto Cain, Why artthou wroth? And why is thy countenancefallen? If thou doest well, shalt thounot be accepted? And if thou doestnot well, sin lieth at the door. Andunto thee shall be his desire, andthou shalt rule over him.~ Genesis 4:6-7, KJV

God was giving Cain a warning here, saying “If you do good, you will be accepted, but if you don't do well, sin will rule over you.”

Choosing to follow your sin puts you in a dangerous place where Satan has a foothold. It opens a door for something potentially worse--much worse.

Cain eventually killed his brother, which shows us the power that sin has to drag us deeper into the pit of death.

This verse explains it well:

 But each person is tempted when theyare dragged away by their own evildesire and enticed. Then, after desirehas conceived, it gives birth to sin;and sin, when it is full-grown,gives birth to death.~ James 1:14-15, KJV

I experienced that living death, and it was a dark, cold feeling of separation from God unlike anything I've experienced in my life. It's only by His grace that I have recovered. Nothing--and I mean NOTHING--on this earth is worth giving up for the sake of our faith.

You are loved by an almighty God,

Darlene

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Teaching Grace

Hi Darlene,

First let me say I agree with everything I have read on your website. I love the guidance you give to have a happier home and marriage, and I have three small children of my own.

My question to you concerns older children and reflections on my past.

I’m sad to say that my dear husband and I 'slipped' from our very faithful ways while we were engaged, and I became pregnant. This resulted in a wedding six weeks later instead of five months later.

When the children are older, and I’ve raised them the best that I can, how can I say if they ask, “Yes, this is what we did, and we repented. You weren’t the mistake but the result of that mistake, and we love you, but don’t want you to go down the same path?”

Because it was so hard on us, in the home and in the church, I would never wish it on anyone and want my kids to be stronger than I was. I can do my best when they are small and hope that’s enough but I just wondered what your thoughts are.

Yours,

Walking strait again, for me and my babies

Dear Walking Strait,

Thank you for your letter and your kindness. I love that you have a zeal for raising your children well, and I’m excited to see how these seeds you are growing will flourish.

The first thing I’d say is that there isn’t any need to tell them until they get to the age where they figure it out and start asking questions. What you and your husband have done is between you and God, and no one else needs to be the wiser. Nevertheless, in most cases, the children start doing the math and once they put two and two together the light bulb goes off, and you may be questioned.

An important lesson that we need to teach our children is grace, and when you answer their questions, you’ll have the opportunity to share that message with them. Grace cannot be understood by those who haven’t learned the gravity of sin. Mingling grace with sin is like trying to teach the concept of light without the knowledge of dark.

Therefore, the more that we teach our children to obey the Word of God and the clear difference between right and wrong, the greater chance they have in understanding the goodness of God.

While you may be tempted to soften the blow by saying, "We made a mistake," or "We slipped up,” it’s important that you clearly point out that your disobedience to God was sin—nothing less. Not that you were a terrible person, or that you’d love your children any less if they were in your shoes, but that defying God’s law is sin, and that our actions have consequences.

On one hand parents want to candy coat things so that their kids get the idea that they were conceived in love, blah, blah, blah… but the bottom line is that YOU had nothing to do with conception—God did. He is directly responsible for life.

Children aren't conceived through sin, or by the outstanding track records of the righteous. They are conceived by the loving grace of God who breathes life into each soul. That's what makes them special, and that's what makes them matter in this world.

For thou hast possessed my reins:
thou hast covered me in my mother's womb.
I will praise thee; for I am fearfully
and wonderfully made: marvellous are
thy works; and that my soul knoweth
right well.
My substance was not hid from thee,
when I was made in secret, and curiously
wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
~ Psalm 139:13-15, KJV


I pray that your deep understanding and acceptance of grace by the Holy Spirit will provide you with the words when the timing is right.

You are loved by an almighty God,

Darlene

For comments or questions, contact me at:
darlene[at]darleneschacht.net

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Am I Good Enough?

Before I clicked publish on this blog, I asked myself, "Am I good enough?" Am I good enough to call myself a Time-Warp Wife? Just because I seek to return to the time-past values I cherish, can I wear that title now--today? Am I good enough to share my beliefs and convictions with others, when I've failed so miserably myself?

I look around the room, and although I've cleaned the house this afternoon it looks like a hurricane hit it tonight. My profile photo is perfect, but I sit here and type in a white robe and socks. My hair is tied back in a pony, and my bangs are unkempt. I sent the children to bed hours ago, and I still hear the shuffle of papers in my daughter's room. She's anxious for school as we all are.

"Go to sleep, Sweetie," I remind her, before she enters the hall for one more trip to the loo. I strive for order in the house, but it gets the best of me most days.

Am I good enough, Lord?

My laundry is backed up, we have few socks to wear, and I have windows to wash. We vacuumed twice today, but the bird had a party in his cage, and seed needs to be vacuumed again.

I'm not a Caroline Ingalls, Olivia Walton, or June Cleaver. I've disappointed my friends, my Lord, and my husband at times. I feel that disappointment today and it wrenches my heart. Loneliness, fear and heartbreak set in.

Am I good enough, Lord?

A voice inside tells me I'm not. It points out my failures and my shortcomings. It reminds me of the many times I've driven my children to school and forgotten a lunch, a note or their gym clothes. It tells me that that I'm disorganized and that I don't measure up to other women my age. It tells me that I'm a sinner unworthy to stand before God.

And then I hear another voice that gently speaks:

"Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God." Titus 2:3-5, NIV

Again I ask, am I good enough Lord? Can I be that faithful servant with every shortcoming I have?

I find the answer in 2 Corinthians...

"Because of this decision we don't evaluate people by what they have or how they look. We looked at the Messiah that way once and got it all wrong, as you know. We certainly don't look at him that way anymore. Now we look inside, and what we see is that anyone united with the Messiah gets a fresh start, is created new. The old life is gone; a new life burgeons! Look at it! All this comes from the God who settled the relationship between us and him, and then called us to settle our relationships with each other. God put the world square with himself through the Messiah, giving the world a fresh start by offering forgiveness of sins. God has given us the task of telling everyone what he is doing. We're Christ's representatives. God uses us to persuade men and women to drop their differences and enter into God's work of making things right between them. We're speaking for Christ himself now: Become friends with God; he's already a friend with you." - 2 Corinthians 5:16-20, The Message

Photo credit: Michael Schacht