5 Ways to Resist Temptation

The other day I got to talking to a married friend and young mother who told me that she was recently approached by an ex-boyfriend who wrote her a heart-felt letter. If that isn’t temptation wrapped in a bow and handed to her on a silver platter, I don’t know what is. But I do know that this happens more often than women are willing to admit. Social networking has opened the door to behind-the-scenes communication and easy access to temptation unlike anything we've seen before.

She isn’t the only woman who recently told me this. The next day I heard a similar story--the names were changed, but the details and the storm of emotions she felt resembled that of the other. Satan knows our weak spot and too often it’s found in matters of the heart.

The initial temptation is an external one, but the lies we start to tell ourselves are internal, and that’s why we need to protect our thoughts before they become action that we live to regret.

Desiring a closer walk with the Lord, both women have made a conscious decision to turn their back on the past and move forward. Praise God for their faithfulness!

I got to thinking about the sacrifice that they’ve made and the reward that God gives to those who diligently seek Him with a pure heart.

For before he [Enoch] was taken, he was commended as one who pleased God. And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him. ~ Hebrews 11:5b-6

I think it’s important to emphasize the words in verse six, “He rewards those…” so that we don’t seek our reward from this world. Let me explain…

We often hear of people who make decisions like this but later they start to question whether that decision was the right one or not. If you give up the chance to be with a handsome, charming man, then start to notice that your husband is really getting on your nerves or isn’t quite as attractive as he once was, you might ask yourself. “What is the point? I’ve given up so much, but I’ve received nothing in return.”

The problem with that scenario—if it should happen, and I pray that it doesn’t—is that we are looking to our husbands for our reward, not our Lord. GOD is the one who graciously rewards those who diligently seek Him, not this world.

A biblical account of this is found in Genesis chapter 39 where Joseph refused the advances of Potipher’s wife. Out of respect to his master and to God, Joseph fled temptation and left. As a result of his loyalty, he was imprisoned by Potipher himself. But notice this portion of scripture:

But while Joseph was there in the prison, the LORD was with him; he showed him kindness and granted him favor in the eyes of the prison warden. So the warden put Joseph in charge of all those held in the prison, and he was made responsible for all that was done there. The warden paid no attention to anything under Joseph’s care, because the LORD was with Joseph and gave him success in whatever he did. ~ Genesis 39:20b-23, NIV

See where I’m going with this? When we look for the praise of others we aren't keen on sensing God's presence. When our eyes are closed to the spiritual world, we don’t notice His favor upon us. And finally, when we look to the world for reward, we don’t see the gracious reward that the Lord is already placing before us.

While we're all dealing with differing temptations in our life. Let's look at five ways we can resist it:

1. Recognize sin when you see it lurking. Don't toy with it.
2. Flee temptation as soon as you realize that you are being drawn away.
3. Study the Bible regularly so that you are equipped to destroy the lies with truth.
4. Pray asking God to take the temptation away, and if possible confide in friend who will lift you up in prayer and keep you accountable.
5. Keep a safe distance between you and those things or people that you view as a potential temptation. Or if you must keep them close as in the case of a working relationship, keep your communication out in the open.

You are loved by an almighty God,

Darlene

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Sin Today - Salvation Tomorrow?

Drawn from my archives

I received a question from a reader that recently had a discussion with a friend of hers about sin. This friend had been having an affair with a married man for some time now, but because of his faith—and advice from his pastor—he decided to break things off with her.

There were a lot of details that I won’t go into, but what I will do is address the question that was at the root of the letter. That question is this, “If God forgives us for everything, how come we can’t be together and make it right with God?”


That’s a good question. Why can’t we sin today and ask for forgiveness tomorrow?

We don’t always understand why God doesn't give us the things we desire, but the bottom line is that we don’t have to understand. God's wisdom exceeds ours, and we are called to accept that. This is what’s known as giving up our will for His.

The minute that we start to question God's wisdom and say things like, "MY God is compassionate, he wants me to be happy and understands that I have to be with this man..." Then we are taking the true image of God--according to His wisdom laid out in scripture--and forming it into a golden calf that we can worship.

It's so much easier to worship something that molds to our idea of what God should be.

We aren't called to walk an easy life. In fact this very thing might be a test that asks, "Are you willing to give up your life for mine?" That's what we're called to do.

When Abraham was asked to sacrifice Isaac, he didn't say, "MY God wouldn't want me to harm this child, MY God is compassionate." He was willing to give up anything and everything he loved without having to understand why. It was counted to him for faith.

Christians live by faith. Taking up our cross daily means that we are fighting a constant battle against the flesh so that the Spirit will win. That's what walking in the Spirit is.

The flesh isn't merely our skin. It represents our human nature along with our passions and desires.

For they that are after the flesh domind the things of the flesh; but theythat are after the Spirit the thingsof the Spirit.~ Romans 8:5, KJV

But when we’re in love with someone or something, everything in our body is telling us that this is right--that this can’t be wrong or we wouldn’t feel this way. That’s where we err. The heart is deceitful above all things, therefore we need to keep our eyes fixed on the Lord at all times and ignore the passions that the heart is longing for. Even temptation this great will eventually flee.

But the root of the question was this:

“If God forgives us for everything, how come we can’t be together and make it right with God?”

I'm going to share a verse that I shared with another lady about a week ago, because it's an incredible piece of scripture that addresses this issue.

And the LORD said unto Cain, Why artthou wroth? And why is thy countenancefallen? If thou doest well, shalt thounot be accepted? And if thou doestnot well, sin lieth at the door. Andunto thee shall be his desire, andthou shalt rule over him.~ Genesis 4:6-7, KJV

God was giving Cain a warning here, saying “If you do good, you will be accepted, but if you don't do well, sin will rule over you.”

Choosing to follow your sin puts you in a dangerous place where Satan has a foothold. It opens a door for something potentially worse--much worse.

Cain eventually killed his brother, which shows us the power that sin has to drag us deeper into the pit of death.

This verse explains it well:

 But each person is tempted when theyare dragged away by their own evildesire and enticed. Then, after desirehas conceived, it gives birth to sin;and sin, when it is full-grown,gives birth to death.~ James 1:14-15, KJV

I experienced that living death, and it was a dark, cold feeling of separation from God unlike anything I've experienced in my life. It's only by His grace that I have recovered. Nothing--and I mean NOTHING--on this earth is worth giving up for the sake of our faith.

You are loved by an almighty God,

Darlene

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Grace is for Sinners

Grace is for sinners. But what about me, Lord? Is your grace for me too?


But each person is tempted when they are
dragged away by their own evil desire and
enticed. Then, after desire has conceived,
it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it
is full-grown, gives birth to death.
~ James 1:14, NIV


I’m writing this blog through a wall of tears, in fact I’ve shed so many tears over this today that I don’t know if it’s possible to shed anymore. I don’t weep for my pain but for those around me. I grieve that my sin is touching the lives of those that I love.

I was so close to God for so long. I read the Bible so often, studying to show myself approved unto Him. I home schooled my kids for six years because I wanted nothing more than to direct them according to the will of God. Hungering for the word of God, I taught myself biblical Greek hoping to unveil the layers beneath, and I started CWO. I was serving God with all of my heart, leading one of the most popular online ministries when burnout set in. I had too much on my plate and I needed to step back from it all.

That’s when Satan crept in.

I was friends with a man, such good friends that our families spent vacations together. And when he started feeling more like family to me I started confiding in him and he in me. One text led to another, and friendship led us to down paths of darkness and sin.

Someone convincing me that he loved me more than anything else in his world was the apple I reached for. I had an affair. It wasn’t about sex necessarily, and for most women it rarely is. It was the feeling of being wanted and loved that I craved. Just one text… just one phone call… just one kiss… each step leading me into the pit of death.

I won’t say I made a “mistake.” A mistake is picking up 1% milk instead of 4. The ugly truth is that I sinned and I have no one to blame but myself.

It’s been almost a year since my husband and I have picked up the pieces. I repented of my sin, turned my life back around and have been doing what it takes to rebuild my future. I’m in awe of my husband who accepted me back with a heart of forgiveness, understanding, and grace. I never understood the depth of his love until I received his forgiveness and realized that I had the love that I craved all along.

And I’m nothing without the grace of God who has cleansed me from sin. It’s that grace that gets me out of bed in the morning and keeps me moving throughout the day.

I started Time-Warp Wife out of that place of grace, all the while wondering if God could use someone who’s broken and tarnished like me. The object of my ministry is to encourage women in their marriage in hopes that they won’t make the mistakes that I have.

I have shared my story with a few close friends, a pastor, and a family counselor, but didn’t feel the need to make it a part of my ministry. I don’t want to focus on sin when there is so much hope for our future. God had other plans.

Yesterday I was featured in our local paper—an enormous photo of me along with a write up called “Biblical Sense.” Winnipeggars did not take kindly to seeing an article with a focus on wives living out their Godly purpose of being that of a help-meet.

I can take their criticism with a grain of salt, what is a little more difficult to swallow however, is receiving email that threatens my family from those who are aware of my past.

"What a bunch a bull. You can put a fake face on at the church too but guess what we are going to start attending. Boy I bet these people who think they know you would love to know the truth about how unchristian you guys really are."

And the threats go on...

Let me tell them first--let me tell you all first--I am a sinner who is nothing without the grace of God. I'm a failure, a slut and a scumbag. Who am I to advise women on their marriage? I ask. But still I feel a nudge from the Lord to press on while His words of encouragement whisper to me:


All who have this hope in him purify themselves,
just as he is pure.
~ 1 John 3:3


I'm definitely not good enough. But truth be told, the world as a whole isn't good enough for anything, would it not be for the grace of God. Grace is for sinners, and it's taking me a while to understand that and accept it, but to tell you the truth it's all I have left to hold on to.

I didn’t want to tell my story publicly, because I didn’t see the need. I didn't want my husband or my children or my parents affected. We have put it behind us and are building a better future that glorifies God and unifies us as a couple. I am so full of joy these days that I can't believe I'm the same person. And I know that I have joy because of grace, nothing else.

I don't know where I'd be right now if it wasn't for God's forgiveness and His righteousness. I really don't. All I know is that I truly felt dead in sin, and now I’m alive.

I wept at my father’s hospital bedside today. Sorry to cause him grief in his last days, but that’s what sin does. It not only eats away at our soul, it affects the people around us.

Dad’s advice to me was this, “God doesn’t care what you did yesterday, He cares about what you do today.”

I'm telling you this, because I believe that there is healing and hope when we confess our sins to one another. I’m not perfect—I’m just forgiven.

I'm sure that the lousy choices you make are nothing compared to mine. They are nothing compared to the apostle Paul's either.

“He brings us to the place where hope was clear. The time before the journey made you old. The place where children live. He brings you back to yourself so you can remember you and Him.” ~ Serena Woods, author of Grace is for Sinners

You are loved by an almighty God,

Darlene

For comments or questions, contact me at:
darlene[at]darleneschacht.net

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