Here I am, divorced, not living with my ex, and I still write about my very hard life that I had with him. Why do I look back? Not only for myself to see what I have been through, but for others who are going through the same thing. It's not easy to walk in these shoes. It's one of the hardest things that I have ever had to deal with, and especially with a child. I learned as I grew up that people get married, it's the right thing to do, and now as I look back, it's great and wonderful and all, but I am not married to him anymore. I wanted that American dream of being married, having a house and family and being with my love, my best friend for FOREVER. It just DIDN'T work out that way. What do I want out of life now? My dream is gone, shattered, and not only that, it wasn't ME who chose to cheat. Sure, I know that when you are married, that everything has 2 sides, or as some people say, 3 sides: his version, her version and the truth. Okay, I can take my side of the blame, but honestly, I wished that he would have told me that he was in love with someone else and ended things with me, instead of sneaking around behind my back all those years. Isn't honesty the best policy here? Or was I just with a guy who wanted his cake and eat it too?
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