Learning How To Get Your Self Esteem Back

Going through infidelity really tears you down, rips you up into many pieces. There were days that I didn't even want to go to work, cook, much less eat anything and all I did was cry and ask the age-old question of "why". You really do have the right to get mad, be sad, yell, scream, cry and ask why, but at some point, you have to get back to normal living. How do you get yourself back though? Most of it involves getting back your self esteem. Learning to accept what you have been through, and getting back on your own two feet is something that may take some time but it honestly can and needs to be done, and it must be done for yourself. If you have children, and family, for them as well.
1. Acknowledge that this ISN'T your fault. You did not make your partner go out and cheat.
2. Understand that grieving a lost relationship/marriage takes time, and that it's okay.
3. Believe in yourself -- you really do have something worth giving another person, even if your cheating partner did not see it.
4. Spend some time with yourself and get to know YOU and what makes you happy.
5. Don't be negative about yourself, learn to love yourself and what you have to give.
6. Take care of you, your health is very important.
7. Do something for yourself that makes you happy.
9. Get mad enough to be able to start standing up for yourself and what you want in life, and the things that you believe in.
10. Put a smile on, find a new hobby, a new friend and go out and try something different.

This all takes time, I am here to tell you, but you CAN get past infidelity, because I did. There is life on the other side, and it can be a new start.
10.

Leaning How To Take Care Of YOU

At first, I didn't quite know how to start this post....everyone is probably wondering about the title, taking care of you! I wonder if you are the person who gets out of bed each morning, fixes breakfast for the kiddos, the hubby, feeds the pets, gets all the morning stuff done BEFORE taking care of yourself..I know that I am. I am guilty of that. Every morning, without thought, I get right out of bed and immediately start doing everything that needs to be done....no time for myself until it's all said and done. But what about if you decided to do something for yourself first? What about getting out of bed, brushing your hair, your teeth, taking your meds if you have any, getting some clothes on, and THEN taking care of everything else? I know it's hard for me, but somebody's gotta do it. Summer is here and the kids are out of school so now's your chance to try and get a break. What about letting your kids, if they are old enough, to help you with some of those "to-do" things on your list? Kids do enjoy helping out now and then, and if not, why not try to give them an incentive in helping? Going through a divorce or a seperation can be so difficult, and really puts a stain on things..maybe you are used to having help from the STBX, and now it's just you. Take some time for yourself each day, even if it's only a few minutes. Having a nice and relazing bath (shower), getting a new haircut or buying yourself something pretty (sexy or just downright cute), taking a few extra minutes alone for a cup of coffee can really give you that extra feeling to keep going. Life really can bring joy after such a traumatic experience, but it takes time, and we all heal in different times. Remember, you still need to take care of you.

A Brand New Year

With the start of a new year coming, I am really looking forward to getting a new fresh start. Now we make plans to move forward, strive to make changes to better ourselves. I think that I am not going to start off with too many resolutions because I want to fulfill them all, so I think it will be a short list this time around.
1. Take care of myself
2. Try and not look back over my shoulder too much
3. Move on with a fresh new attitude.

How about you? I know that his cheating really hurt me alot, but I cannot change anything that happened. I wish that I could have, but had to realize that I can only change things about myself. That's what I am going to strive for this new year.

What If "The Other Woman" Had Something ICKY?

Once I found out the he was cheating on me, I didn't want to face the truth. I was scared, scared alright, right out of my wits. I didn't know what I was going to do about it. I thought about the fact that he was cheating with who knows WHO !!! What kind of person was this "other woman"? Did she have good health, or did he even use protection? That was something major for me to think about. I knew that I was ok as I had gotten a clean bill of health not long before I found out, but now that I knew about his infidelity, thoughts kept racing through my mind. I was fearing that I would have to go back to the Dr. but in reality, I turned out to be fine. But what about the ones who pass other nasty things on ? Keeping a good check on your body and how you feel is super important. Going to the Dr just to make sure all is alright is also very important